I got one comment on the English blogtext – Hanna meant that women all anywhere would like to read what I write. She made my day. She also said the the tone, the voice was the same as when I write in Swedish. There you are, it´s me, always. No matter if I try to disguise the woman writing, to fantasize about someone else´s life and adventures – there is always me, somehow.

Then that´s it. Me.

I´m still breathing, still walking, albeit more slowly nowdays, don´t ever run or jump. Don´t know if I still dance,  noone has asked me for a dance in years. Dance alone at times, yes. But with a partner? My fingers are still able to write on the keyboard of my laptop, no artrosis there. So far only in my knees, and I am keeping that at an acceptable level by training and walking.

My brain still is on my side, it´s only at times difficult to remember names. I have to let the search go, and then suddenly there is the name. My memories are what they are, not always the same as my sisters´. They seem to change as times goes by. Or I change them to something I want to remember. So I also forget what I do not want to keep, that´s been quite helpful during certain periods of life.

My dear friend Jack had read an old letter I wrote on the blog, years ago, to Joe – a loved man in the US. A physically very strong attraction between us, one that we never explored further. Married both of us – stopped him, would not have stopped me… Meeting once a year for some ten years, then other reasons for me going to US disappeared, I got divorced and began living with Ulf.

Jack wondered if I could not reconnect with Joe, my letter made him think of The Bridges in Madison County…  

We have had contact via mail, he knows of my gambling addiction, that Mats died, and Ulf and Jan, my book – and what kind of life I have had in all those years, since. I know he has sold his business exploring the sediments in the sea, and retired. A bit at least, he always worked a lot. The love remains a warm memory. And that´s it. Life.

Eight years ago, with longer hair and maybe fewer wrinkles – time goes by